Shanghai Afternoon Typhoon

So we left Vancouver and travelled halfway around the world to escape "Rain". But Rain's stronger, older brother, "Typhoon", somehow tracked us down and wanted to play with us in Shanghai.

Apparently this was one of the worst typhoons to hit the region in 50 years. To us, it seemed like just another rainy day in Vancouver.

During our post-typhoon afternoon tea break, we sit back and ponder our thoughts (as we often do): What type of meat is in the dumplings when they are just called "dumping" on the menu, how people can perform electrical work on the streets beside puddles with no safety gear while children run around...etc. This time, the question is:
"Typhoon vs. hurricane vs. monsoon? What are the differences in these storms? or are they different names for the same thing?"
ANSWER:
"A 'MONSOON' is the same for a seasonal wind. It had its origins around the Arabian Sea, where winds blow from the northeast for six months of the year, then from the southwest for the other six months of the year.
The term is now used in other parts of the world.

In the United States, the 'MONSOON SEASON' occurs when summer's upper-level ridge of high pressure sets up over the Great Plains, and the clockwise flow around it sends humidity from the Gulf Coast region back into and across the Desert Southwest. Suddenly, normally arid places such as Phoenix, Las Vegas and Palm Springs have just enough humidity in the air for thunderstorms to develop during the afternoon hours which then last into the evening hours. This normally takes place from late July through August, lasting into September. Some years, it's more noticeable than others. Some years it lasts longer than others. This year, with the upper-level ridge so huge and strong it has started earlier than normal.


a typhoon is just what they call a hurricane in the pacific. Both hurricanes and typhoons are tropical cyclones. Hurricanes are a bit more specifically defined than typhoons. The American Heritage dictionary defines a hurricane as a severe tropical cyclone originating in the equatorial regions of the Atlantic Ocean or Caribbean Sea, traveling north, northwest, or northeast from its point of origin, and usually involving heavy rains. The same source describes a typhoon as a tropical cyclone occurring in the western Pacific or Indian oceans"

Things that we find "interesting" about China locals

#1 The Squatting: All the locals don't sit, they squat. Even when there is a bench to sit down on, they will squat ON the bench. For hours. And it's a hard position to maintain - we even tried it! We challenge you all to try squatting, flat-footed (this is the difficult part) for 5 minutes. Hard hey?

#42 The "To-Go" Method: Getting noodles and soup "to-go" consists of dumping your entire bowl of noodle - soup and all - in a small, thin, clear plastic bag and eating it from the bag. Surprisingly, the soup never leaks.

#15 The Gobbing: Everyone here "gobs". This consists of the act of hacking up flem really loudly and spitting it out the window and/or on the floor.

#3 The Honking: They love to honk their horns. They honk when they are about to pass someone. They honk when they are in the process of passing. They honk after they have passed someone. They even honk when they are thinking about passing someone, and that thought has passed. We actually discovered (and tried out ourselves) that the horn has been strategically rewired from the steering wheel to a small, sensitive button on the stick shift, where just the slightest touch will make the horn sound.

Things we love about China:

#3: 1 hour foot massages for less than $6 CDN

#28: Fresh ginger-mint tea

#71: Men sitting around on their street with their shirt pulled up, showing their bellies




Next stop: Yunnan province!

The Great Escape.

They had dashed through the sensory overload of Hong Kong, survived the madness in Guangzhou, and succesfully arrived in Yang Shao. But this was going to be their most difficult mission yet: to escape from the sewer-smelling-hospital-feeling hotel owned by the sneaky and conniving owner they call Thomas who had tricked the 2 noodle ninjas into staying at his crappy hotel for 3 times too much.

It was 6 am. K and An had their bags all packed. Their route all mapped out. The plan was to make a mad dash from the sewer hotel to the heaven hotel 2 blocks down before the crazy pushy sewer hotel owner woke up.

"Ready?" An whispered. K gave the ninja sign for "ready". Just as An reached for the doorknob, there were 3 loud knocks at the door. It was Thomas. It was as if he knew we were about to escape.

"GOOD MORNING!" He bellowed. "We have breakfast for you! You wait here okay?" He gave a slimy smile and gave us the "You better not leave" look.

K and An, horrified, decided to make a make a mad dash for it as soon as the coast was clear and Thomas was out of sight. They raced through the streets and turned the corner, frantically running to the heaven hotel with their big backpacks. Just when they thought the coast was clear, a scooter looking disgustingly familiar was racing towards them. It was Thomas. He had tracked them down.

"Why you leave??? I have breakfast!!! I give you big discount!" He held up two bags of noodles.

After a few minutes of advance noodle ninja negotiating technique, An and K were finally rid of Thomas and headed inside the heaven hotel. Freedom never felt so good.

How to Cross the Street in China a la Frogger

Step 1: Find a crosswalk and wait for the light to change from "don't walk" to "walk"

Step 2: Realize that no one pays any attention to either of these signals.

Step 3: Wait until there is a swarm of people who also need to cross the street and place yourself in the middle of the group so they will shield you from the cars, buses, bikes, scooters, and beggers.

Step 4: Commit, close your eyes, run, and hope for the best!

Homage to Chinese School

Up until I was 14, I used to hate Saturday mornings. I mean, really hate them. Because Saturday mornings meant that everyone else I knew got to watch Saturday morning cartoons while eating pancakes (and as I got older, it meant sleeping in after a night of partying), while I got dragged to Chinese school and go through concentration-camp-like language drills for 6 hours. Through all my grumbles and sulking, my dad told me sternly "Someday, you will appreciate this."

And I did.

On the 30th of August, when we were trying to buy a bus ticket to get out of the hell-hole aka Guangzhou, where no one had a soul, and definitely would not give anyone the time of day if they did not speak Chinese, I finally appreciated all the Saturday mornings I had sacrificed to go to Chinese school.

So thank you Daddy. You were right.

weso.twicky

have been in china for 5 days now and haven't been able to blog due to the china firewall. through some ninja moves and expert computer hacking, we now have a voice. let the blogging begin...